"a place where we ache to go again"

Lately, I've noticed that when Friday hits I forget that's it's actually Friday - the start of the weekend, a night to unwind. Our days around here have always been much less structured than other people's days (one of the luxuries of being in academia), but with Baby Beeton, they have taken on this eerily similar quality. One day runs into the next with feedings, playtime, naps, and nightly bedtime battles. Not much marks the difference between a Tuesday and a Wednesday.

Tonight, I decided we needed to do something, anything, to kick off the weekend, a small attempt to reclaim just a little bit of our old life. It's been heavily raining the last few days, but around 2:30 pm today, the clouds broke, and the sun was shining. The heavy humidity lifted as well, and it felt the way a day in October should feel. We packed up Baby Beeton and Ella and headed to Glen Echo Park - which began as a National Chautauqua Assembly in 1891 (read up on the Chautauqua movement - it's fascinating!) and served as an amusement park until 1968.

(Image from Vanished America)

Now, there are a host of little buildings devoted to various arts, a ballroom, a playground, and the old carousel. They have all sorts of good stuff - especially in the summer - like puppet shows and concerts, and today we saw a wedding with the reception all laid out in the old bumper car area.

(Image from http://www.flickr.com/photos/kevinborland/sets/72157606522249902/)

We walked around for a while, gawked at the bride, and swung on the swings. We were even able to get dinner from the concession stand and eat it out on the picnic benches.

But, perhaps the best part of the whole day was in the parking lot when we pushed Baby Beeton really fast in the stroller and heard his first squeal of delight - genuine laughter! Of course, we made him do it over and over again. I'd say that that's a pretty good way to get the weekend started.


Keep sweeping (or swinging), Martha

100 days of...

Yesterday, at the Takoma Mamas group, one of the group members brought all these amazingly beautiful and yummy treats (I had this little puff ball thingy that melted in my mouth and exploded with the most delicious flavor) to celebrate her baby's 100 day birthday. In Korea, she explained, the 100 day celebration is incredibly important because it means that the baby has overcome some of the most difficult, early day obstacles and should be on the road to good health and happiness! On the day of the celebration, the family is to share with as many people as possible these special treats. The more people who eat; the more good fortune for the child.

It made me curious as to when Baby Beeton's 100 day celebration would be. Turns out it would have been on September 7th, if I calculated correctly, Grammy and Papa Beeton's wedding anniversary! What a coincidence. I have to say that can only mean good fortune.

Keep sweeping, Martha

Finished reading Little Children by Tom Perrotta (I do not recommend reading this book if you have just had a child or are in any way experiencing any kind of marital strife at the time of reading. Of course, it you don't have a degree in Women's Studies or a penchant for Patrick Wilson-types, you'll be fine.)

pamper me

So maybe it doesn't make sense to follow a blog post about the stress of parenting with a blog post about using cloth diapers. After all, what about cloth diapers are going to make your life easier? Weren't disposable diapers invented to make your life as a parent less of a burden?

Many people greeted our declaration to attempt using cloth diapers with skepticism. The nicer ones simply nodded but looked mildly concerned. Some more vocal parent friends indicated that there was no way we would ever be able to do it. Admittedly, we have faced parenting challenges that we never knew would exist. But, surprisingly, transitioning to cloth diapers, which we've done this past week, was not one of them. If anything, the whole system is a lot easier than we ever anticipated - especially with the help of our trusty friend the Internet.

We decided to use disposable when Baby Beeton was little because, on some level, those vocal parent friends were right. Adjusting to life with baby was hard enough without an added complication. But, this past week, we decided to switch over to cloth diapers because we're on (a little) firmer ground as parents and because Baby Beeton has grown in size and fits into the cloth diapers much better. It helped, too, that most of the moms in the mom group I started attending use cloth diapers, so we've got a built in support system of other parents who share such tips like which are the best diapers to buy (Blueberry) and which laundry detergents work without fail (Charlie's Soap).

My initial inspiration to use cloth diapers came from this post that I read on one of my favorite blogs Young House Love. Like us, these bloggers were initially motivated by money (a motivating factor for us when it came to breastfeeding as well); they are thrifty and love a bargain (also like us), so they did some calculations and realized that cloth diapering could save them in the long run. And, they seemed to find cloth diapering to be rather simple, so we thought, upon reading, what the heck. Let's try it.

We had put twelve cloth diapers from Bum Genius on our baby registry. We got six from friends and family at various showers, and after experimenting with those six, we decided we'd take the plunge and buy six more. We also bought a hanging diaper bag from FuzziBunz (in chocolate brown to match Baby Beeton's room... I never did post nursery pictures, did I? I'll add that to my ever-growing "To Do" list). This purchase was suggested by our friends from Savannah, K&D, have a little girl just a few months older than Baby Beeton; they are in our cloth diapering support group as well and found the bag to be super useful. It unzips at the bottom so you just throw it (and the diapers) in the laundry when you are ready to go. I've been relying on this site for information about washing, detergents to use, etc. It's been very helpful. So now, during the week, when we are home, we use the cloth diapers. We still use disposable at night and when we travel, but we've cut down considerably.

I have to admit that my impetus for cloth diapering is a vain one. They are just so darn cute - as you can see from this picture (I don't usually post in color, but how adorable is he in this one - color "Ribbit").


But, I've found that I like them for a lot of other reasons, too. They seem softer and more comfortable; they do help with the environment. And, since I like doing laundry, I don't find the whole cleaning thing onerous (the tips from the site listed above work really well... they have come out clean - i.e. not stained - each and every time so far). Of course, if I were back at work (did I mention I have until Fall 2012 off!!!), this would be a whole different story (in fact, a lot of things would be different... the little Prince would take a bottle, I'd be even more of a nervous wreck, the house would be even more messy), but for now, I have the time to indulge myself in a little over-the-top, stay-at-home mothering.

I got an email the other day with a link to this article and found that quite a few of the "things" really resonate with me. Of course, not the part about your dog being just a dog now that you have a baby. Never.

Keep sweeping, Martha

Finished reading Stranger Here Below by Joyce Hinnefeld.

simple kind of life

Holy cow. This parenting thing is hard.

When I was pregnant, I got a kick out of how all the doctors I saw insisted on bringing up repeatedly the fact that I was A.M.A. For those of you who are not in the know, that means "Advanced Maternal Age." I laughed when they said it. After all, though I may be 37 years old, I still feel like a 14 year old. But lately, I've been wondering if they were right to draw my attention to my A.M.A. Parenting certainly is exhausting. Teaching, researching, writing can in no way compare. Caring for Baby Beeton day in and day out is like an extended lesson on a really boring topic, like the proper use of the semi-colon - you've got to get psyched to face your audience, you've got to make it entertaining, and you've got to be energetic. When Baby Beeton hits the sack at 8 pm, I feel all of the energy drain out of my body... until he wakes up again for that 1 am feeding. Then, I've got to switch it on again.

Maybe I would have been better off starting this family a little earlier.

After Baby Beeton was born, I found myself thinking with nostalgia about when I first moved to D.C. I lived in a tiny studio apartment on Wisconsin Avenue. I taught only two classes a semester. And, most days, when I finished teaching class at 2:15 pm, I'd head home to walk Ella and take a snooze on my balcony. I was spoiled, even if I didn't know it at the time. In that actual moment, I remember being pretty miserable. I didn't have many friends; I struggled to make sense of my students who were so very different from the students at the University of Delaware. I felt like I was super busy and super stressed. I didn't know what busy and stressed really look like.

But this past week was a nice calm. It made me think that maybe - just maybe - this is what is in store for me. And, if so, I like it. Monday, Baby Beeton and I walked up to McDonald's for a coffee. We came home and napped together. On Wednesday, we went to the local new moms' group, and when we got home, Baby Beeton napped while I read. Thursday, I headed to Figs to have lunch by myself and really start working on this book I'm supposed to be writing. On Friday, Baby Beeton and I drove out to Leesburg to spent the day shopping with Grammy Beeton. And, on Saturday, we had our neighbors now friends over for dinner. I found myself - during this week - finding pockets of time where everything felt like my same old normal life, only quite a bit better. Like I said, if most weeks are going to be like this, I'll take it. I've got to remember these moments for what they really are.

Keep sweeping, Martha

Finished reading A Visit From the Goon Squad by Jennifer Egan (definitely going on my top books of all time list).

a few good dips

This post is long overdue.

When we moved last spring, we received this really thoughtful housewarming gift from my college roommate of four years (!) and her family.

It consists of some terrific recipes, but the true beauty of it rests with what you can't see in this photograph. There is a pocket in the back that contains tiny slips of paper that list a bunch of terrific dips that we went to college with (I won't name names). The recipe book has been on my mind lately because I've been thinking a lot about my roommate and her family, because our fifteen-year reunion is on the horizon, and because Mr. Beeton and I have gone to two parties in the past week where we've had to bring something (and dip is what we brought... nevermind that we had to leave both parties early because it was Baby Beeton's bedtime and he let everyone know it). In my new mom frenzy, I fell back on a tried and true dip - taco dip. But, like my roommate who I always considered one of the most fearless people I've ever met (even if I didn't ever tell her), I should have been more daring and branched out. After all, I was promised I'd impress at least a couple of people.

Tried and True Taco Dip

• Mix half a container of cream cheese with half a container of sour cream.
• Add taco seasoning.
• Transfer to a flat casserole pan or other fancy dip dish.
• Top with salsa, grated cheese, shredded lettuce, and tiny tomatoes.

Keep sweeping, Martha

dear future martha

When we were visiting family in Chicago at the end of July, K's mom said, "Just wait until three months. Everything changes then." Today I was thinking I should write a note to my future self, detailing what's important to keep in mind when facing life with a newborn. The opening line would be, "Remember what K's mom said. She was so very right."

I can't believe how much things have changed in the last two weeks. When Baby Beeton first smiled, things began to get lighter, easier, and then, lately, things have really settled down. We've gotten into a groove with feeding. I no longer feel constantly stressed about the upcoming meal. He's much, much more active, wildly moving his arms and legs and grinning widely at everything Mr. Beeton, Ella, and I do. Being more active means he's sleeping more regularly. Usually (knock wood), he'll go to sleep between 7-9 pm, sleep until 1-2 am, eat, and then go back down until about 7 am (we're so lucky, I know). He's also started to nap more regularly (thanks to K's sister K's recommendation - Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child). Usually, a morning nap in the Snugabunny bouncer and an afternoon nap with Momma and Daddy or in his crib. I've never been one to crave a routine (I mean, just look at my profession), but with Baby Beeton, a routine has made all the difference in my sanity. I love it.

These are the things that I need to remind my future self of if and when my future self begins thinking about adding another one to our pack. Grins and naps... and all the items that have made my life a little bit easier these past few months. When we registered for our showers, we didn't know what the heck we were doing, but we made our best guesses. Some of our requests were hits; some misses. Here is a short list of my favorites...

1. Fisher Price Surround Sounds and Lights Monitor - Lots of people advised us that a video monitor was the only way to go, the only way that we would get peace of mind. But, we're frugal people, and we couldn't see spending that kind of money (or expecting someone else to spend that kind of money) on a baby monitor. This is the one that we ended up getting, and it's served us very well. We don't live in a mansion, so we probably could have done without a monitor. But having this on at night when Baby Beeton is upstairs makes me more relaxed.

2. Halo Sleepsack Swaddle - Mr. Beeton would disagree with me on this one. He thinks a good old fashioned blanket swaddle is best, but I had such trouble with that method that when a friend of mine from college gave us this velcro number as a gift I was over the moon. No more needing to wake up Mr. Beeton in the middle of the night and say, "Can you swaddle him?" (Baby Beeton, by the way, is addicted to swaddling. He can't get enough of it. I had to rush order a bigger one for him today since he seemed to grow out of his old one over night.)

3. The Rachel Bag by Timi and Leslie - I love, love, love this diaper bag precisely because it doesn't look like a diaper bag. But, it's got all these fabulous pockets and baby accessories that hide inside it. When I sling it over my shoulder, I hear Stacy London say, "What a cute mom-on-the-go!"

4. Anything that gets me out of the house (i.e. our stroller, our Ergo baby carrier, and/or our Baby Bjorn) - We have a variety of methods for getting out of the house, depending on Baby Beeton's mood. We scored our stroller, which is a Bugaboo Gecko, on Craigslist; a very tall woman (who lived in this amazing green building in Silver Spring) decided to sell it for half the price because she was frustrated that it didn't have an adjustable handle. We got the bassinet, the upright stroller, and the car seat converter from her for multiple means of travel. Our his and her baby carriers (Ergo for Mr. Beeton and Baby Bjorn for me) are for when we don't want to lug out the cumbersome stroller or when we want a guarantee that Baby Beeton will remain calm (he loves to be "babyworn" as much as he loves swaddling).

5. Anything Boppy - Originally, I had asked for the Boppy to help out with breastfeeding, but it doesn't really work for me in the way that I expected. Instead, I prop it behind me when I'm feeding Baby Beeton. But, it's best for morning playtime. Baby Beeton likes to sit in it and laugh and laugh and laugh. Oh, and the Boppy changing pad sets are a lifesaver. We use them in the bassinet, in the carriage, and on the changing table. Instead of constantly changing and washing sheets, we can just throw the pads in the wash when spit up occurs.

6. Breastfeeding has been a challenge for me. I must remind myself that this is not my fault for a host of reasons, including Baby Beeton losing more weight than he should have his first few days out, the crazy antibiotics I was prescribed that unleashed their havoc on my system, and my tendency to be susceptible to blocked milk ducts. There's a host of products that have made this unpleasant obligation a little more bearable (see here, here, here, here, and here... ooo! and all the herbal remedies recommended by the women working here). (By the way, things are now going swimmingly... head control makes all the difference.)

7. Angel Dear - How sweet is this little blankie? We call him Zboo, and we take him wherever we go. Thanks, Auntie M.


8. 3marthas.com burp cloths - My hairdresser at Georgetown Aveda gave Baby Beeton a "Welcome to the World" gift from Dawn Price Baby - a bib and burp cloth from 3marthas.com. I love, love, love these burp cloths. They are not only functional (essentially a cloth diaper) but also stylish (the cute little sewed on characters add flair).

9. Books, books, and more books - At all three of my showers, we got lots of books for our little prince. Right now, our favorite is Henry and Ribsy (thanks Honorary Aunt J).

10. Wee Gallery Art Cards - I admit. I was skeptical about this one. The description alone made me want to cringe: "Wee Gallery art cards are created from bold, whimsical, hand-painted originals that cater to a baby's visual strengths. The black and white images and their repeating patterns captivate little ones. Place them in the crib to transform it into a wee gallery or use them as flash cards for older children." How pretentious. But, they are pretty fabulous - especially the free ones that came from a formula company. We like them so much that we made a mobile out of them.

A friend of mind teased that any good shopaholic would be delighted to have an addition to her family. After all, a whole new world of shopping opens up. I have to agree, though with our little one comes even more limited resources. So, I'll bookmark this post to reference if the future brings more Baby Beetons. Stocking up on the essentials and eliminating the dross means more money to pour into our very own little Money Pit.

Keep sweeping, Martha

everyone knows it's windy

It's been quite a week... earthquakes, hurricanes, and the first time in 31 years that I'm not headed back to school in the fall. A very strange convergence of events indeed.


Photo courtesy of Philly.com.

Keep sweeping, Martha

Finished reading Cutting for Stone by Abraham Verghese and Sippy Cups Are Not for Chardonnay: And Other Things I Had to Learn as a New Mom by Stefanie Wilder-Taylor.

P.S. Thanks, H, for the blog post title.